Some Tips for Hosting

As mentioned in my last post, I recently catered and hosted a Christmas party for 75. I love to have my home full of conversation, good smells, beauty and laughter, and throwing a big party is just the ticket. This is the second time I've hosted this particular party, although we've done other similar events. I've learned some tips and tricks along the way.

Tip #1 - Enlist help
Find several helpers, and choose them carefully. Find people who either love to serve by nature, or want to learn about hosting. We used real dish ware, so washing dishes was an all-evening affair for 3 people (in the mudroom, by hand). I also had some parking attendants at the beginning, and asked helpers to replenish food and drinks. They were also the ones I counted on to help with a myriad of small tasks, and I just supervised and tried to sit down as often as possible!

Tip #2 - Meticulous planning
I'm a list-maker and nothing brings me more pleasure than to cross things off. Creating a menu, shopping and to-do lists are so much fun for me! I got a little spiral notebook just for this party and kept it close by at all times for a few weeks ahead. Once I knew how many guests to expect and the budget, I could set to work coming up with a menu that was tasty, manageable and met various dietary needs (aka, omnivores, vegetarians, lactose-intolerant, etc...things have really changed since I first got married and started hosting!). Careful planning and lists, lists, lists are key to throwing a big party.

Tip #3 - Don't offer too many items
I had about 15 menu items, which in hindsight is still a few too many. Consider having 3 or 4 "wow" items and then fill in the rest of the menu with the old standbys. Inevitably, there are the crowd favorites and the duds...and sometimes you can't predict this; I made sure I had plenty of shrimp cocktail, but we had gobs leftover and not nearly enough California rolls. I wanted this menu to be "international" so we offered items from the Mid-East, Asia, Italian, Caribbean and American.

Tip #4 - Don't try to make everything from scratch
I decided to make a lot of the food here at home, but I outsourced some, too. On the day of, I picked up ready-made falafel, sushi and bbq from local sources. I made baked ziti and a creole sauce with rice and beans several days ahead and stored it in the freezer. I bought some desserts and had my daughter make a few items. My other daughter has a great salad recipe so I asked her to make a massive quantity of it. I kept the drinks simple - just sweet tea and flavored waters, hot cider and coffee.

Tip #5- Plan out each day's activities for a week ahead
Starting with shopping, I worked a little each day leading up the the event. Several things I could cook ahead and freeze, but then finding space for those items to thaw had to be factored in. So each day had a few tasks, considering storage space in the refrigerator, freezer and oven. I assigned tasks to myself and those that were helping me on the day of. And of course, my sweet husband was willing to give me his entire late afternoon to be 'on call.'

Tip #6 - Include ALL tasks, no matter how small, on that list!
Lighting candles 15 minutes before showtime is an essential and time consuming task! Put it on the list! Changing from my work clothes to my party clothes was also on that activities list, as was turning on the coffee makers. Cleaning the bathrooms, stocking toilet paper and making sure the dishwasher was empty were other things on that week-of list. And delegate, delegate, delegate. Decide what you must do and then give the rest of the tasks to someone else.

Tip #7 - Don't sweat the small stuff
At the last minute, we were blowing breakers left and right with all the coffee urns and outdoor heaters. We had to scramble to find a solution, but I passed that off to my husband whom I trust to do things well. We ran out of broccoli salad, and someone set a small fire on my dining table. But we just deal with those things...remember to keep the main thing, the main thing...we want everyone to be well-fed, feel appreciated and just have a good time being together.

Tip #8 - Leave the big clean up til morning
I am DONE by the time everyone heads home around 10 pm. So, even though the kitchen is a disaster, I leave it until the morning. I know I will have tons more energy when the sun comes up, and I will tackle that project bright and early. I asked my helpers to get all the dishes, glassware, forks, and coffee cups cleaned before they left, and I took care of the serving platters, trays, coffee urns, etc. myself. I turned on my favorite Pandora Christmas station (Johnnyswim Holiday, btw) and worked like a little Christmas elf all morning.

My home was designed with hospitality in mind. One of the best spaces is the kitchen/breakfast/keeping room area, where all 75 people stood at the end of the party for a little speech. In addition, I have a large covered porch with a fireplace, so I installed curtains to enclose it, and bought some outdoor heaters, which gave us lots of extra overflow space, even on a December night. Two years ago when I threw this party, I moved a lot of my furniture out and brought in tables and chairs and made sure there was a place setting for every person. This year, I left the house as it was, brought in folding chairs and we had a more casual affair. I find that only about half of the people actually sit down at an event like this; most people are on the move with their plate in hand and only sit for a few minutes at a time. I counted about 50 places to sit in my house the way it was (furniture, fireplace hearth, outdoor chairs, ottomans, etc.) so I didn't need a ton of extra seating. Thankfully everyone milled about from the kitchen (where the food was served buffet-style on my island) to the other rooms on the first floor.

I'm looking forward to hosting again in the new year. This is my way of showing people that I love them, that I appreciate them. And I feel a huge sense of satisfaction knowing that they ate something yummy in my home and shared life with me.

Menu:
Shrimp shooters (2 shrimp served in a puddle of cocktail sauce in a shot glass)
Creole sauce with Rice and Beans (veg)
Baked Ziti (veg)
Bacon-wrapped dates with goat cheese
Falafel with Tahini (veg)
California rolls (veg)
NC BBQ sliders
Anitipasti (cheese, olives, nuts, grapes, crackers) (veg)
Lobster bites
Broccoli Salad
Caprese Skewers (veg)
Oreo Truffle balls
Chocolate covered pretzels
Assorted Cookies
Candy
Hot cider
Coffee/tea
Flavored still and sparkling water
Sweet Tea

A Spring Full of Change

Our entire family with both sets of grandparents

I just noticed that my last post was February 19th, and it seems like a year's worth of exciting changes have taken place in that 3 month period. I am so full of blessing right now,  I could burst. I know that these sweet seasons of life don't always last for long, so I am committed to savoring this one. I have a tendency to let myself feel guilty when I am experiencing good things, because I know so many people are struggling. But I have also been in those tough seasons, and when life is good, it can be a time of sharing and letting your overflow lift others up. So I hope that someone will be encouraged as they read about our spring.

We welcomed our first grandbaby, Esther into the family in December, born in Seattle. We were delighted to learn that her parents planned to move to North Carolina in April. I was able to take another trip to Washington to help them move (aka, hold Esther while they packed and loaded the truck). I. Can. Not. Imagine - being here while Esther grows up in another state. I know that this is a likelihood in my future (that at least some of my future grandkids will live far away) but from the time I first held her, I've known about them moving here so I've always felt pretty relaxed about not having to say goodbye. Esther is a sweet, sweet baby who smiles and laughs easily and is just incredibly cute all the time. I love having her in my home so much. And of course her mama and daddy.

Love having ALL my kids here!

About the same time we were welcoming our daughter's family, my husband had a huge breakthrough in his extended family relationships. I don't want to go into details on this public forum, but suffice it to say that 35 years of struggle has become a delightful and blessing-filled relationship. The joy and relief related to this reconciliation is beyond words. It has taught us both that nothing is ever impossible, it is never too late, and hope for any situation is always a possibility. It has given me hope for many other situations.

Motorcycle ride on the Blue Ridge Parkway

And after 7 years of travel and trying to hold our building business together, Kirk was able to leave his corporate engineering job and come back to our company full-time. We have had an unprecedented spring in terms of contacts and leads, so much so that leaving his j-o-b was a no-brainer. I have not seen my husband so happy getting dirty and sweaty all day for so, so long. He wakes up at 5:30 every morning excited to put his hands to the work he loves so much, and then sleeps deeply and peacefully every night. I love so much having him home, cooking for him, taking walks with him, watching him work. We are like newlyweds again and spend every minute together we can.

       

Another family dinner

Our sons have both moved on to new phases of their lives as well. Our older son and his freshly minted dentist of a wife have bought their first home in their new city. Our younger son and his wife are moving this week to a new town where he will return to school to pick up a second degree. Big decisions for both of them, but it is so rewarding to see them growing into such fine men.

ASU graduation

And our baby girl graduated from college Mother's Day weekend. She is temporarily living at home as she looks for a job, but we love having her delightful self around.

Good and deep lifetime friendships abound. We are in good health. Our vehicles are running well. We have more than enough in so many areas of our lives. Our home has been full of visitors this spring, and we have hosted so many interesting people. I was reading through our guest book the other day and reflecting on the privilege of hosting the world here for overnight stays and meals. Our guests have been from South Africa, Scotland, California, Poland, Nashville, Washington, New Hampshire, Italy, Swaziland, New York City, Korea, Uganda, Texas, Florida, and on and on. Students, professors, pastors, worship leaders, missionaries, orphans, families, friends old and new. This is certainly one area where it is possible to let this overflow spill out to bring refreshment to others. So many people need a restful, quiet place to recharge, and we can provide this.

I am grateful.

Esther and The Guv'nah

Updates on a Budget

I guess the blessing and curse of being an interior designer, is that you want to keep up with the trends, and you...WANT TO KEEP UP WITH THE TRENDS. This translates into a thorough 'out with the old, in with the new' compulsion about every 5 years or so. We are not fabulously wealthy, so I have to tame the beast when it comes to satisfying the urge to bring a fresh look into my home so frequently. But I do find that my interiors start to look dated, especially when it is my occupation to build homes that are stylish and appealing to a wide range of buyers. I am constantly perusing Pinterest and blogs for light fixtures, cabinets, flooring, paint colors, etc. and it just whets my appetite all the more about my own home. I sometimes hate that about myself, especially when I let my brain settle down and start thinking about a more global perspective on priorities...

But alas, we have been in our home for almost 7 years now, and it was time. I was up for the challenge of changing things up on a budget, so I rearranged some of my stuff and created a fresh look on the mantel and then tackled a few rooms and projects slowly, making use of thrift stores and large doses of elbow grease.

First up in 2014 was our master bedroom. I painted the walls a warm neutral called "Latte" (Sherwin Williams 6108) back when we built the house, because I knew it would provide flexibility with any future changes. In addition, I always keep white/off white bedding on hand, and just change up the rest. I wanted to bring a serene, neutral palette to the room that invites us in to relax. For about $250, I did the following:

• Stained two antique sewing tables from my favorite thrift store with a quick swipe of Rustoleum stain in "Driftwood." I just painted it on, and lightly wiped it off. I replaced the wooden knob with a cute $6 dangle pull from Anthropologie in aqua. These became my bedside tables. (I did something similar to a cherry chest of drawers.)
• I bought two lamps on sale for about $15 each from Lowe's that were the shape I wanted, but I didn't like the base. The glass had been painted from the inside so I swished a LOT of nail polish remover around and wiped it with a paper towel. This gave me clear glass bases, which I covered with cute fabric lampshades. 
• Two throw pillows from Home Goods, one in gray, and one in pale aqua (down filling only, please) and a cotton cable-knit throw from Ikea completed the bed. 
• Using a small swatch of leftover fabric from another project, I recovered a small bench, and a yard of a cotton velvet was enough to make two tiny pillows for my little white boudoir chairs. 
• My big splurge was to replace my ceiling fan/light. Although I hated to lose the fan capability, I figured if I was really dying at night, I could always add a small fan on the floor...but I really wanted a beautiful light hanging from the ceiling with a dimmer switch. It brought a touch of elegance to the room, and soft overhead lighting. 
• Lastly, I added a simple sheer scarf draped over the existing curtain rod to just soften the lines of the window, and let all that natural light in.

Several months later, the next project was an extra bedroom on the second floor. We had painted this room bright green when we moved in and filled it with black and white accents, and although we all loved it 7 years ago, it was time for a relaxing change. Looking for a gray/khaki/white/gold combo with very few subtle pops of color. For about $200 I:

• Painted the walls "Worldly Gray" (Sherwin Williams 7043). I have used this color in several of our new constructions, as it is a warm gray and works with just about everything. 
• Spray painted several accent pieces gold: candle holder, few picture frames, metal wall hanging, and some brushed nickel drawer knobs for the existing white dresser. 
• Bought a pillow with gold sequins at Home Goods for the bed; again covered in white/off white bedding. 
• Covered an old fabric headboard with a furry twin-sized blanket...this was enough to cover a queen sized headboard. Just wrapped it around the existing fabric, and stapled it on the back. 
• Made a pillow with some scrap fabric. 
• Scrounged around my 'stuff' and found some quiet prints framed in gold frames. As well, I found some black and white drawings and photography framed in black. 
• Brought a beautiful bassinet up from storage for my new little granddaughter coming any day now! 

BEFORE:

    

AFTER:

Lesson learned: Often you can update your rooms with a can of paint and a ruffle through your stash of family photos and pictures. I am not a pack rat, but I do understand that trends come and go, and if I just hang on to a few things, they will come back around someday. Who knew that gold/brass would come back to haunt us? I've even seen antique brass door knobs in stores recently! Noooo!!

Our home is designed after the beautiful villas we had seen while living in Italy, and part of our original plan was to install rough hewn beams in our kitchen ceiling. But we never got around to it, until my talented and industrious husband decided to go for it a few weeks ago. It was precarious at times, but we did it together and had lots of fun and near disasters! Materials cost a mere $150, wood and stain. 

As the baby's due date approached, I found I had this nesting instinct to get my lingering projects done and installed...even though I am the Nana, not the Mama! I had a really cute antique chair that I found at the thrift store for $5 that needed new padding and fabric (extra I had in my stash) and a quick coat of paint. 

    

And I really wanted to update my lighting without getting new fixtures. What to do? What to do?... I decided to try making a lampshade that would fit over the curvy lines of my very traditional breakfast table chandelier. For a first attempt, I am rather pleased with the way it looks. I will do a few things differently next time, but I learned a lot of lessons along the way. 

• I ordered an 80' piece of bamboo edging (1"x1/8") that came in a roll from a seller on Ebay for $20 (figure I can make some more lampshades!). Calculating the circumference I would need, I cut the bamboo on a chop saw and glued it into 2 equal circles and let it dry while clamped. 
• Using poster board, I cut pieces in the width of what I wanted the shade's height to be. For this 27" diameter fixture, I made the shade 14" tall, and 29" in diameter. I removed the top level of bulbs (the fixture originally had two levels of lites, 6 on the bottom and 3 on the top). The poster board was glued and clamped to the two hoops with clamps.
• Once dried, I hot-glued a length of fabric in the same manner and covered the rough edges on the interior of the shade with binding tape in a similar color. 
• Now the tricky part was to determine how to actually hang the shade on the fixture. I decided to create a triangle of bamboo edging glued together that could rest on the three candelabra bases where the bulbs had been removed on the top layer. The triangle then rested on the 1/8" thickness of the bamboo edging on the inside of the shade...not super secure but since (most likely) no one will be swinging from it, it works. 

  

Now, come on Baby Girl! We are ready for you to arrive! 

Thrift Store Obsession

Now that we've got Jon and Stacey married, it's time to turn our focus to our daughter Abby's wedding to Dave in April. We've all been working hard to do all the planning tasks, including juggling schedules and meetings so that they can make plans when they are here in town. See, they live 3,000 miles away and the wedding is here! So a few days after my son's wedding in December, we had appointments with the seamstress, the rentals company, and the caterer. The caterer. Hmmm. The caterer (to whom I've given a $500 deposit!) has filed for bankruptcy. I doubt we will see our deposit or any catering services, since it's been a month now, and no contact from them at all.

So, I've rallied the troops: all my dear friends with a similar passion for cooking and hospitality will help me throw a dinner party for 200 in my backyard. One of our desires is to make this reception as visually stunning as the bride herself...although I doubt that is possible, actually. No plastic platters from the party store for us! I am on a mission: to amass as many silver platters, trays and water pitchers as I can possibly store in my home. There are wonderful thrift and antique stores here in my home town and they were loaded with these items until I arrived and bought them all! (Actually, me and Nan - I have a little friendly rivalry with my neighbor, Nan about these outings. We try to see who found the most amazing items at the best prices.) My kids think I have lost my mind and am hoarding. Some were only $2 and $3! They were terribly tarnished as a result of many years of neglect, possibly buried in the back of some barn for 50 years, but I saw past all that ugly and realized there were treasures to be had beneath. There must be many a little old lady who left her earthly treasures to the PTA Thrift Stores in this little town, when she passed on. Who knew?

Hard to tell from the photos, but the one in the middle says it best (before and after).

Wright's Silver Polish to the rescue!

Here are some more examples of the finished products...

So beautiful wedding reception, here we come!